The Montreal Massacre reminds us that male entitlement comes in many forms, and is always dangerous

Men invent new ways to hate women all the time. Today’s progressive iteration is no different.

On December 6, 1989, at around 5:00 p.m., a 25 year-old man walked up to the second floor of École Polytechnique in Montreal, entered a classroom, and separated students into two groups: male and female. He directed the men to leave the room. “I hate feminists!” he announced, before firing at the women. The man continued up to the third floor, where he shot more female students before taking his own life. Fourteen women were killed, and 14 more people were wounded.

In his suicide note, the man explained that he killed himself “for political reasons,” and that he had decided “to send the feminists, who have always ruined my life, to meet their maker.” In the same note, he listed a number of other women he intended to target, including Quebec’s first female firefighter and police officer, as well as well-known feminists.

The killer, Marc Lépine, was angry that women were taking up space in areas traditionally dominated by men, and felt he and other men were being unjustly excluded from positions he believed men were entitled to. Women, in other words, were stepping out of line and out from under the thumb of men. Julie Bindel explains that “the pro-choice movement was galvanizing at the time of the massacre.” She writes:

“Six months earlier, a Quebec woman, Chantale Daigle, had scored an important victory by overturning an injunction, obtained by her violent ex-partner, at the Canadian supreme court, preventing her from ending a pregnancy. More than 10,000 women demonstrated in Montreal streets in support of Daigle.”

Because Daigle was born female, a man had determined she did not have the right to decide what she did with her own body. That man was attempting to control her reproductive capacity —  as men throughout the history of patriarchy have always done.

In 1989, feminist attempts to escape gender roles led to male resentment, and a desire to punish those responsible. Are things so different 28 years later?

Today, those who stand up for women’s sex-based rights are smeared and branded as “TERFs.” Women accused of excluding males from the spaces men believe they are entitled to access are threatened with death. Feminists who wish to speak about sex-based oppression and name the perpetrators of violence as male are no-platformed. Women who try to ask questions, have conversations, or challenge sexist discourse about gender and womanhood are not only silenced, but targeted with violence. The left is, once again, pushing women out of their parties, bullying them, and refusing to listen to or address their concerns.

Today, men have adopted a new tactic to attack feminists, claiming the banner of progressivism and inclusivity. They have disguised their entitlement and fears about women’s liberation and autonomy by claiming to support a newly invented population, supposedly more marginalized than any other group, and whose feelings trump women’s human rights. Rather than turn to one another and demand males stop targeting gender non-conforming men (as well as women) with violence, they have turned against feminists. As always, somehow women are to blame for men’s violence.

The students at École Polytechnique were targeted as females who were not behaving in accordance with the feminine gender role imposed on them. According to “gender,” those women should not have been in that classroom. Those women were not “privileged,” as so many progressives claim today, on account of being “cisgender.” They tried, in many ways, to escape their gendered status under patriarchy, but could not. Their femaleness wouldn’t allow it.

On the eve of December 6, Vancouver Rape Relief and Women’s Shelter (VRR) released statistics compiled from their frontline crisis work in 2017. VRR alone receives 1200-1400 calls per year. This past year, they report having heard from:

  • 582 women who were raped by their husbands, boyfriends, or lovers, and another 86 women who were raped by ex-partners.
  • 60 women who were sexually assaulted (in most cases, raped) by male supervisors or co-workers.
  • 297 women who were sexually assaulted by someone they knew superficially, often through social circumstances like parties, mutual friends, or dates
  • 80 women who were raped by their own fathers when they were children or young adults.
  • 120 women were sexually assaulted or raped by other family members or family friends.
  • 83 women assaulted by men who were strangers to them.

Last year, the BC Federation of Labour (BCFED) supported a policy blacklisting VRR, Canada’s longest running rape crisis centre, because the organization caters explicitly to female victims of male violence. VRR believes that women’s oppression exists as part of “a system in which men and women are born into a social order in which men rule over women” and that the violence men perpetrate against women within that system is sexist violence, “perpetuated and accepted in our society because of that social order.” Because the shelter operates on a peer counseling model, VRR only permits women to become counselors, explaining:

“Our peer counseling is based on our shared life experience of being born female into the oppressed class, women, and subordinated our entire lives from girlhood into womanhood.”

BCFED decided to punish them and defund them because of this feminist analysis of male violence under patriarchy and because of this method of supporting female victims.

Men who are invested in maintaining a system wherein they hold power over women are also invested in invisibilizing that system. They are invested in pretending that male violence against women is not systemic, but random, or somehow the fault of women. Perhaps those women acted out, held wrong politics, or refused to include men in their spaces and organizing. Perhaps those women were mean, or rude, or hurt those men’s feelings, and that’s why they were beaten. Maybe they were raped because they expressed themselves in too “feminine” a way, by wearing a short skirt, or by flirting, or by giving a man the “wrong idea.” Maybe those young female students at École Polytechnique were killed because they took up space without thinking about the men like Marc Lépine that would feel hurt or left out as a result.

Maybe they all deserved it. And maybe we all deserve it now. If only women would stay in their place, men wouldn’t be obligated to silence us, threaten us, rape us, beat us, and kill us. If only we would express ourselves differently, perhaps we could escape our fate.

Of course this isn’t true. And, of course, every day, there are new victims who must prove otherwise, because they had the unfortunate circumstance of being born female.

Men invent new ways to hate women all the time. And they invent new ways to justify their violence. Today’s “progressive” iteration is no different.

Meghan Murphy
Meghan Murphy

Founder & Editor

Meghan Murphy is a freelance writer and journalist. She has been podcasting and writing about feminism since 2010 and has published work in numerous national and international publications, including New Statesman, Vice, Al Jazeera, The Globe and Mail, I-D, Truthdig, and more. Meghan completed a Masters degree in the department of Gender, Sexuality and Women’s Studies at Simon Fraser University in 2012 and lives in Vancouver, B.C. with her dog.

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  • Ginny Brown

    Thank you, Meghan. So soon after women on the political left took significant steps forward, less than a decade ago, in discussing and more openly tackling rape culture, its supporting ideology and related anti-woman political practices, many men, and some female co-travellers, became extremely concerned about trans rights. Not so much access to housing and decent social support everywhere, which trans people certainly deserve, but more specifically feminists’ preparedness to deprioritise females’ needs and instead centre our program around the inclinations of those born male.

    As you observe, the tactics change but the anti-woman motivation remains the same.

    • Meghan Murphy

      You are right on, Ginny.

  • Polly MacDavid

    Trans rights is all well & good as civil rights for all people go but trans ideology is anything but progressive or liberal. It is quite conservative, propping up silly stereotypes of femininity & masculinity that should have been abolished years ago. Honestly, some of us actually thought they had been abolished. At least, on the way there.

  • Meghan Murphy

    I’ve had ‘friends’ tell me that radical feminists were the result of having experienced horrible trauma. My response was, “If that were true, there would be a hell of a lot more radical feminists.”

    • As if there were lots of women who have GOOD experiences with male domination and they need to be heard too. Horrible trauma = being a woman in a patriarchal society. If it weren’t horribly traumatic, we wouldn’t be fighting back against a system so entrenched and so popular.

    • Missy

      Exactly. It’s actually too bad it doesn’t work that way since pretty much every woman and girl alive would be radical feminists then. With those numbers we could enact real change and our progress would move much faster. Just as importantly, we could finally embrace the bond of sisterhood that we’ve been deprived of by men and patriarchal brainwashing which trains us from childhood to hate both ourselves and each other.

    • Hayley McPhail

      The NSNDP Executive member and NSGEU employee who harassed and threatened my friends for their association with me, not only called me a racist behind my back (because apparently in white SJW land, not recognizing a penis as a female organ = racism) but she accused me of being a victim of child sexual abuse. There is no low that these people will not sink to in order to defend their misogynistic liberal nonsense.

    • BornACrone

      If by “horrible trauma” they mean openly recognizing that living in a patriarchy sucks elephant dong, then sure I’ll buy that theory. o_O

      It sounds like the old medical handwaving about “drapetomania,” really. (The fact that they hate being beaten and worked to death means that they’re mentally ill! It certainly doesn’t mean that they are sane and perfectly rational to despise their condition!)

  • Meghan Murphy

    Agree. Silence is absolutely not the right response. We must continue speaking out. Silence is exactly the aim of misogynist bullying and violence.

  • Missy

    I completely agree. Handmaidens piss me off as much as misogynistic men. They allow themselves to be used as tools to prop up the patriarchy and often do men’s dirty work for them by keeping other women “in line.” I know we can chalk it up to brainwashing since patriarchal conditioning is what makes both sexes subscribe to the ridiculous gender roles assigned to us, but I feel there’s a difference between women who are beaten into submission, (and this applies both physically and mentally), and women who know exactly what they’re doing and do it for personal gain at the expense of other women and girls. I think a lot of these women with internalized misygony benefit from the patriarchy, not in the same way as men of course, but enough so that they are willing to throw other women under the bus in order to maintain their position as well as for that oh so condescending pat on the head from men.

  • Meghan Murphy

    Yes! Exactly. Thank you for this context, sister.

    • Wakame

      Is she actually your “sister”? I mean “Sister” is a biological term. If you are going to insist that we can’t call trans women “women” because they are “biologically male”, then surely you shouldn’t call people who are not your biological sister “sister”.

      • Meghan Murphy

        You are an imbecile, but have conveniently revealed (as if we didn’t know already), via this comment, that you have zero knowledge of or connection to leftist movements, in general, or to the feminist movement in particular.

  • BornACrone

    This is basically the inside of my brain, and it’s all true. Would it be nice to live in a world where I could enjoy a man’s romantic/sexual company and not feel like I just let a grizzly bear into my personal space that I had to keep a firearm trained on at all times just in case? Of course it would. It would be lovely to just relax and … I don’t know, love one of them I suppose. But we just do not live in that world. It would also be nice if I lived in a world without cancer, restaurants that put capers in my lasagne without telling me, and car accidents. But we just don’t live in that world.

    The thing is, I think if more women just stared this in the face and admitted it — and more men looked in the mirror and saw the problem — we’d be more than halfway on the way to getting a grip on it. But we’re surrounded by “not my Nigels” and “My huzzbin does the dishes!!!!! I’m so pathetically lucky and grateful!!!!!!” and “The world owes me pussy right now!!!!” and … well, it’s not going to change. So it’s incumbent on us to create good, enjoyable, and effective lives for ourselves. 🙂

    I agree with you about the fact that the future, if we’re to have one at all, must be female. I think about all of the serial rapists and abusers and harassers who managed to get that psychotic monster into the WH, and how he now has 12 CVNs at his beck and call and nuclear codes … all because said serial rapists and the society they spoke to couldn’t handle a competent, intelligent, powerful woman. He may spark World War III and a nuclear exchange, turn Israel into a glass-lined crater, and send the entire Middle East up in flames, and it will be because our society hates women.

    Humanity’s woman-hatred will be the death of it. We will go EXTINCT because we hate creation, because we can’t tell birth from death and sex from murder.

    And we will deserve it.

    • Missy

      Yup, men make it pretty much impossible to love or even like them. We’re expected to keep loving and serving them even while they oppress, dominate, beat, rape, and murder us. We’re not allowed to name the problem without a resounding chorus of “not all menz” followed usually by more nonsensical women-hating and being blamed for what men do to us.

      I agree that humanity deserves whatever is coming to it. A species that despises the creators and bearers of life deserves Mother Nature’s wrath and retaliation that will strike us down, and it will be happening sooner than later all thanks to men’s obsession with destruction and death.

  • BornACrone

    There is NOTHING the world hates more than a pair of X chromosomes that isn’t cooperating in its own gaslighting.

  • Cassandra

    Well said. “Intersectional” has been used to support the interests of everyone except those to whom it actually applies.

  • Cassandra

    I’m sorry this happened. It’s very discouraging to read but we need to know the truth. In any case, GOOD ON YOU for speaking up.

  • Cassandra

    Fuck off you fucking moron.

  • Liz

    yes thank you! I did not understand that slogan for the longest time. The third-wave “version” of it made no sense to me, and that’s all I knew.

  • FierceMild

    Oh my! What a truth bomb! Did you hear that, ladies!? the Accidental Eunuch says we should be angry at black women for wanting to be treated well rather than being angry at men for treating all women like property. Women should definitely focus on blaming each other, particularly the subgroup of women with the least amount of cultural power, rather than blaming the men who actually oppress and victimize us. We’ll get right on that, Eunuch, thanks for the tip.

  • FierceMild

    On the bright side, there aren’t that many generations worth of time left on this planet for humans if male privilege and male civilization continues as it is now. So either way male domination will end and it will end soon.

    • Missy

      True. It’s just so unfortunate that women, children, and animals also have to pay the price for men’s selfishness and unethical and destructive behavior towards the planet and every other living being.

  • FierceMild

    Don’t despair! I’ve been in similar situations and I found out that it’s the public forum that stops them saying what they actually think. In private the people who agree with you will admit it.

  • FierceMild

    So your conclusion is that women should shut up or men will get angry? We already knew that, bro. The silence of women has never been enough to purchase a reprieve from the violence of men.

  • anne cameron

    Oh thank you, Son. I’m so glad you mansplained it to me. I’m nearly eighty years old and have been waiting ever-so-long for you to mansplain the obvious.
    And sorry to disappoint, but I don’t intend to shut up. Been making noise for a long long time and will continue to my last breath.
    But mansplain on, Son. It gives you something to do.

  • Ennis Demeter

    I remember that being a trope in TV shows and movies back in the day. The climatic moment when it was revealed that he killed her because she laughed at him. Never told to highlight his horribleness, but hers.

  • Alienigena

    The Alberta Human Rights Act does not list biological sex as a protected category.

    “WHEREAS it is recognized in Alberta as a fundamental principle and as a matter of public policy that all persons are equal in: dignity, rights and responsibilities without regard to race, religious beliefs, colour, gender, gender identity, gender expression, physical disability, mental disability, age, ancestry, place of origin, marital status, source of income, family status or sexual orientation;”

    I didn’t realise that. I think we really need to take all our governments to task for excluding biological sex. I don’t know if gender replaced sex or if sex was never one of the categories included in the act.

  • Alienigena

    “Do you think this is because, in general, anthropology is a male-dominated field and these women are just afraid to lose their place in it?”

    Don’t agree that it is male dominated, at least it was not when I was a graduate student in the early 1990s. The majority of students in my intake year were female. All of the physical anthropology students (primatology students) were female. Female faculty members seemed prominent and respected. The current department head at my alma mater is female and someone I know (I was her TA). When I attended the university anthropology was a separate department from archaeology. I haven’t really kept in touch with faculty or students so I don’t know the dynamic in the department.

  • Christine

    Kathleen, I’m a little late reading this, but THANK YOU for speaking up.

    Your story makes me more sad than angry, too. I am reminded of my first-year anthropology prof emphasizing to us that people are depressingly slow to change their attitudes.

    A panel on feminist anthropology should be the perfect place to discuss trends in trans activism and trans ideology. It should not take extraordinary courage to broach those issues. But in this climate, it does, and you are very brave.

  • Wren

    Yeah, the metaphor works. It’s all just placation, but you’re right, a room full of educated women should know better. This is infuriating.

  • Wren

    lol totally. He really sounds like he’s tweaking. I’m not sure wtf he’s going on about.

  • BornACrone

    Academia on the whole runs according to trust-fund rules, and a lot of the people that make it through have sort of been brainwashed into that way of thinking. (If they haven’t been, they spend a lot of time ripping their hair out.) And there’s a lot of “privilege guilt” going around in the humanities and social sciences where every discussion results in a roomful of white women competing with one another for the tiara for Wokest White Lady In The Room. (In the physical sciences, it’s the other way around: they’re all men, and they’re all trying to sound like that butt-ugly little shit from Google who wrote his terribly “daring” MRA memo.)

    So anyhow, academia sucks ass, basically. It doesn’t suck the way the left OR right wing think it does, but it does suck. (Which seems to sort of be the hallmark of radical feminism, doesn’t it? Yes society sucks, and we are unlucky enough to understand how it sucks in a way that pisses EVERYONE off and that doesn’t align with either of the only two permitted and mutually exclusive entrenched political camps!)

  • catlogic

    Oh, so men never tried to undermine feminist activity before the theory of intersectional feminism existed? Suffragettes were never attacked and imprisoned and force-fed? Women never, in fact, had to fight and fight and fight for basic human rights at all?

    • FierceMild

      Nope, it was all those black women keeping down…black women and brown women and Asian women, and white women, and First Nations women. You know, like black women do. The oppression of women in general is what black women, according to our dear Eunuch, specialize in. It’s how they like to spend their 63-cents-on-the-white-man’s-dollar.

      Remember how all those black women voted for Trump? Remember how they fought to get rid of healthcare for women? Remember how black women ran an organized campaign called Metoo to keep all women down and perpetuate an atmosphere of harassment and sexual abuse against women? Remember how black women started an organization called BlackLivesMatter and a movement called SayHerName in order to keep black people down and promote a culture that legitimizes violence against people of colour? The Accidental Eunuch does…I wonder if his world has the same money as our world?

  • Hanakai

    Well, if it is any consolation, I am hit with all sorts of hostility and idiocy when I explicate that transsexuals are mentally ill and delusional in thinking they are the other sex, that sex is biological fact and unchangeable and that any population with an alleged suicide rate of 41% is profoundly pathological.

    I think the millennial mind has been destroyed by smartphones, porn, Third Wave male-worshipping faux feminism and the toxification of the environment. I mean, really, women will argue with a straight face that one can change one’s sex and that there are 161 different genders. Smart phones, stupid people.

    Give me stupid phones and smart people!

    • Po21

      I do think there is a problem with technology evolving too fast. I finished university 5 years ago and I dont remember it been so hostile ( it was still full of misogynist pricks but the trans ideology was not as present). Now people are so used to only read the first link on google they lost the ability to think critically. They will just listen to whatever looks “progressive”.

  • Kelan Fox

    I agree fully. It is inconvenient for men to fight these systems. However, logic and human decency show radical feminism is the only ideology that could allow a man to be “one of the good ones”. Myself and many men I know are waking up to our socialization and questioning our every decision, including porn consumption and prostitution.

    I lurk in many radfem spaces on the internet to learn and encourage other men to do so. Reading the articles and comments from women here breaks my heart and makes me want to do better. It doesn’t matter to me that it’s inconvenient and I hope other men have to humanity to reject convenience for the sake of justice. I don’t know if any of this adds anything of value to feminism and it’s not my place to decide.

    Sorry for rambling.

    • Nadja Penaluna

      The Cult of Masculinity strips men of their fraternity and humanity. Its singular dimension is violation. I appreciate that you acknowledge this sad reality.

      One thing: radical feminism is not an ideology, but a an “active praxis/practice” (see Hannah Arendt’s book The Human Condition).

  • Amy

    We know that trick, dudebro. To try to get women to fight with each other instead of uniting to fight the real enemy, go try that BS elsewhere loser

  • Amy

    Ugh the nerve of that guy, “Can you imagine feeling like your body is wrong from the time you’re a child”. Yes all women have felt that way. We’re constantly told our hair isn’t thick enough, lips arent big enough, waist isn’t small enough, our body hair is gross, etc etc. In fact women spend tons of time hating and trying to “fix” our “wrong” bodies.

  • FierceMild

    It’s true, people are hiding out of fear and letting women handle the mess as always. I don’t mind so much when other women, for their own reasons, need to maintain silence on this. I wish they wouldn’t, but I get it. It’s really the people causing the problem to begin with, men, that I’d like to see take a stand. There’s only one man (maybe two Robert Jensen?) that I’ve heard take a public stand on this and that’s Derrick Jensen…weird that they’re both called Jensen.

    • Po21

      Men are such hypocrite. They would rather preach their virtue and show how progressive they are. And even if they make new laws for transgenders, they dont care,it only affects women. They will let anyone pretend they are the other sex to be called an trans ally. Yet behind their backs they all laugh at them and call them trannies. Obviously they know transwomen are men, otherwise they would give zero fucks about them.

  • Nadja Penaluna
  • Denise Denning

    As a pharmacist, I studied various maths, chemistry, physics and biology. In 1982, I was the only girl in my grade 13 physics class, and my grade 13 calculus teacher made it clear that he thought women “did not belong” in math, as we had the wrong kinds of brains. I remember thinking back in ’89 that the École Polytechnique shooter (I don’t use his name, and I respectfully suggest others do the same; one of the motivations for these assholes is a narcissistic desire to be remembered forever) was targeting women like my friends and I, who were in engineering, pharmacy, computer science, medicine, dentistry and the various sciences. A lot of us were shy and quiet nerds who lived at the library. But in 1989, I realized that even if women kept their heads down and worked hard and didn’t bother anybody, they could still somehow be offensive because they had the nerve to study subjects that didn’t belong to girls.

    • Missy

      The reactions of the threatened male ego can range from obnoxious vocal bigotry to extremely dangerous and deadly behavior and actions. Men already hate competing with each other, and with women not only adding to that competition but often performing better than them in subjects and careers that had always been considered male-dominated, the male’s narcissistic entitlement goes into overdrive, and of course it’s women who suffer the repercussions. Misogynists always feel emasculated and lash out at confident women who are much smarter than them. As long as society promotes and enables men to behave this way there will be no real equal opportunities and fair treatment for women. It’s long past time the problem was nipped in the bud and solved once and for all, but in order for that to happen we have to be allowed to name the problem first without the stigma surrounding doing so.

  • Canadian_Moxie

    I remember starting engineering 4 years after the massacre and always having a measure of fear in the back of my mind of something like this happening at my university. It is completely unacceptable that any woman should be fearful in this way. This is something I’m sure my male colleagues didn’t give a moment’s thought to. Unfortunately, there are too many women and girls afraid of violence around the world just for having the nerve to educate themselves.

  • Missy

    I don’t have kids, but I’ve also noticed this about mothers with only sons and specifically women who prefer sons over daughters. They make the worst handmaidens and play a big part in upholding patriarchal norms and expectations. Like I said in another post, there’s a difference between women who have been worn down into submission because of strict, patriarchal cultures and the ones who just have internalized misygony and benefit from the patriarchy. The latter group eagerly try to please their male masters by attacking and openly slandering the female sex, both women and girls. Heck, a lot of men are less misogynistic than these kind of women. They are completely male-identified, and I don’t mean in a trans way, I mean in a male supremacist way. They’re just as ignorant and dense as misogynistic men too.

    • FierceMild

      I have found it interesting that for parents of my generation (oldest millennials) a father of a daughter is more likely to be actually feminist in his opinions than a mother of a son. I don’t know if this is just the group of people I’m exposed to or if it’s a wider phenomenon.

      I know my own feminist awakening partly began with Peggy Orenstein’s ’Cinderella Ate my Daughter’. There are those who think having a daughter is a crap reason to become a feminist, and I understand that. I also think it’s reasonable that one begins to scrutinize cultural institutions when one is about to subject a brand new intellect and heart to them.

    • Deb Rina Carr

      Truth is stranger than fiction with the explanation, it is the male DNA that horizontally transfers to a women’s brain when she is pregnant with a male child. This parasitic transfer of DNA remains present and may be the reason for increased risk of autoimmune disease.

  • FierceMild

    I agree that fathers need to be allies and to model a different set of ideas and behaviors. But I don’t agree that a mother’s misogyny is neutral in the formation of boys (or girls).

    I’m trying to be clear and I think I’m not quite there so let me try again if you’ll be so kind. Here are my givens:

    1) The problem is Patriarchy.
    2) Patriarchy is primarily perpetuated by men.
    3) Men pass on shitty Patriarchal behavior and ideals to their children.
    4) Until men put a stop to Patriarchy it will continue because they’re bigger, stronger, and in positions of power.
    5) It is up to men to change themselves.

    With all that fully recognized I would like to observe these things as well:

    1) Women are the ones who have actually torn pieces away from Patriarchy so far.
    2) Women also have behavioral patterns that support Patriarchy.
    3) Women – who have a much greater incentive than men to chafe under the yoke of Patriarchy – could fight in subtle ways that will not draw much negative repercussion.
    3a) One of those ways is to raise their sons to treat girls with respect. When they don’t do this women are failing to do what they can do to help other women and it sucks.
    4) This is not as big a problem as men creating entitlement and shiftiness, but it isn’t neutral either.

    • Kiwipally

      A main cue that children pick up on, assuming different sex parents, is the way the man treats the woman. It does not matter what values, etc, the woman tries to instil into the children because the way she is treated by her partner, in front of the children, forms the view that the children have of male-female interactions and the relative value of men and women.

      If she is treated badly, the children will
      – not respect her
      – identify with the father in order to protect themselves
      – as part of self-protection, join in with any abuse of the mother
      – use the father to overrule any decisions the mother makes, that the children do not like
      – adopt the social roles of the mother and father, so that female children become deferential to males and male children become abusive/overbearing to females.

      Thus, the role of the male parent has the largest impact on the children. Thus we need to focus on the men.

      Yes, internalised misogyny in the mother can be shitty, but it’s not as big an impact on children as the attitudes and behaviours expressed by the father.

      Can we stop blaming mums now?

  • Missy

    I would say that both my parents believe in equality, (equal opportunity and freedom), for women, but they do have some really old-fashioned and religious beliefs that prevent them from being liberated from patriarchal brainwashing.

  • ptittle

    hellyeahimafeminist is always open to guest posts (just so y’all know!)

    • Missy

      Thanks for the tip. I haven’t been to that site before, it looks awesome!

  • ptittle

    Atwood: Men are afraid women will laugh at them. Women are afraid men will kill them.

  • Missy

    Thanks. 🙂 Feel free to copy and post it anywhere if you want.

  • Meghan Murphy

    I don’t use that term so can’t speak to that. I just use the terms ‘woman’, ‘girl’, or ‘female.’

  • Lara

    This is sickening! On top of worrying about being killed, assaulted and raped for living in our female body we get laughed at and ridiculed for being female too. We get laughed at for running like a girl, hitting like a girl, talking like a girl. We get ridiculed for liking pink and sparkly things as a girl cos it means we’re empty headed bimbos while men and boys are being celebrated as being brave for doing the same thing. The endless mockery of living in a female body is just too depressing to contemplate.